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What Is Family?

5/17/2018

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As I close my eyes and drift away to a land where there is love, health, peace, and blessings. I wanted to take the time to think and reflect.

     The truth is the other day, I was reflecting upon Mother's Day. Why is this day significant, and especially thinking of mother's who do not meet the  norms orientated by the media. We can take these thoughts and think about the family in general. What is family, and how are the norms projected on a nuclear family, placing expectations on those who are not placed in these types of families, or don't fit the norm projected of the nuclear family? The truth is that families come in all different shapes, and sizes. There are always the invisible expectations, that are derived from the norms of stereotypical images. We can take any family, to illustrate these thoughts. A good current example would be that of the family of Ms. Megan Markle. As we hear reports that her father will not attend her wedding, and will not walk her down the isle. This example shows that a family can be famous, or royalty, but still not fit in the norms, expectations, that are derived about the family. 

    Family is important, they are the relational bonds that we are given. However, these relational bonds don't necessarily mean that everyone is going to be there for you. In your time of need, your happiness that you want to share, or the sadness that you desire comfort for. The reality is that just because the relational bonds are given, it does not mean that they are going to be maintained. As we grow, develop, and begin our own lives, not everyone is going to understand your journey. Not everyone is going to care. But when these bonds begin to come in the way of your own growth, development, or impede, transgress the heart, what is one to do?

     For this all I can say is that no one can give you everything, the only person that can give you everything is you. While we can keep the bonds of family together by respecting each other's path, it should not meant that we suffocate family members, so that we begin to impose our paths on them. Of course if others want to share your happiness, successes, times of joy, or when you need comfort, then what more can any one ask for? But this is not always going to be the case.

     Respectfully, respecting each other's path, while we ourselves follow our own path. Not doing so, or not following your dreams, only evokes a death to the self, or the spirit. We can never make everyone happy, especially when it comes to family. And even when it comes to the idea of family - a family doesn't have a right to put a claim over you. Sometimes it is those individuals who were there for you, when no one else was that deserve this claim. 

My thoughts to share with love & kindness! :) 

Notes: These thoughts were originally hand written on May 17th, 2018.
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    Shazia

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